Sunday, August 29, 2010

The Distraction of Whales

As I was studying this morning's Gospel Doctrine lesson it occurs to me that the story of Jonah's involvement with the interior anatomy of a whale is an unfortunate distraction.

For the first time in my life, I recognize that the real miracle in this story is the reprentance and conversion of an entire town of people of perceived (in the minds of the so-called faithful)hardcore sinners who were not part of the covenant church (non-members). The second misunderstood miracle is the patience that the Lord shows to a rebellious, stubborn, biased (and probably fox news watching, well intentioned, bigot of his time) member called to minister (home teach or proselyte) to persons he considered barbaric enemies. Much to Jonah's disappointment not only does the Lord love them enough to send a messenger, but when they actually do what the Lord wants them to do, he is dissapointed that they don't metaphorically burn in hell and the Lord spares them. Jonah decides to wait on the hill to wait for hellfire and brimstone, but instead he is the one the Lord both blesses, chastises and teaches by virtue of a gourd and a worm. The worm is considerably less dramatic than being swallowed by a large sea going mammal and regurgitated.

The story of Jonah is really not about miracles, it is instead about those character defining moments of learning to love (oftentimes with some serious prodding from our heavenly father) and serve others in spite of our pride, our stubborness, our ethnic, racial, political, religious or other biases, and our simple human tendancy toward rebellion in all its forms.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Planetary Alignment and When He (She) Just Says No

Click here for interesting theories and commentaries as to Men's roles in sexless heterosexual marriages. I would have to agree that(choose your answer):

1. Sex IS a lot of work (at least until you get enough practice).

2. Partnered life has a lot of distractions.

3. A lot of expectations are placed on certain types of "performance."

4. Partners as they age and reproduce just don't look as attractive as they did at the beginning.

5. Anger and unkind words are a major turnoff.

6. Physical, mental, spiritual and emotional problems can interfere with desire.

I partially blame the movies and the media for setting us up with false expectations. Sex, in reality, has always been messy, inconvenient, dangerous and has had a lot of potential negative consequences. And, more often than not, it is a lot of work if not in the actual act, the preparation for the act. And, I've read that it is even more "work" or "sacrifice" when in a mixed orientation marriage. I acknowledge and honor that.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Tony Kennedy and the Supremes

One thing I love about the Prop 8 issue being before the courts is that it is, in general, quieter. Last night, however, the junior partner of the home teaching pair raised some questions regarding what happens next. Many analysts and pundits see the whole issue being left up to Justice Anthony Kennedy as the swing vote. I shared with him, that since I have had more exposure to Tony Kennedy than the average citizen, I'm fairly certain that he will vote to uphold gay marriage.

I guess that isn't really what my guest wanted to hear. That gay marriage is now possibly on its way to becoming the law of the land.

His partner really didn't want to hear my speculation that the LDS church would eventually become a pretty gay friendly church either. What do I base this counter-intuitive perspective on? The last verse of Section 124 of the Doctrine and Covenants, the manifesto, and the 1978 priesthood revelation. Read those three together and I think you can follow my reasoning and understand that with or without a revelation, practice and policy may change. Which is not say they will go as far as sanctifying gay marriages in temples . . . .

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

A Better Boob Story

A very close friend of the family wished to fairwell The Kid by giving us a barbeque lunch before he departed the airport for a place distance to begin his college education. Our friend lives with two other gentleman, all of somewhat curious personality. All three are best described as eccentrics. They are all older than 65 years of age.

Upon arrival, one of the men, we shall call him E, was busy with the bbq. The first thing I noticed about E was how much I liked his new haircut, a bob. The second thing I noticed about E was that he was wearing a pair of dangling earrings. The third thing I noticed about E was that he had breasts.

So, I racked my brain (no pun intended). Did E have breasts the last time I saw him? Some men have naturally larger breasts. I couldn't remember. Had my friend mentioned that E had some sort of hormonal imbalance or illness? No. E was wearing a non form fitting t-shirt in a dark color, but I did ascertain a distinctly female curve to the breasts.

E either was in the process or had finished sex change surgery.

Ok, so onward and forward. Not so easy, because DH brought the subject up in the basement away from E who was outside manning the bbq. Yes, our friend informed us E is now a she. The Kid knew before as he had been over to visit a couple weeks before. By the end of the bbq we were all calling E by her new female name.

We all had a very good time. DH however reports feeling shocked and wishing someone had let him know before hand. I, on the other hand, feel just a little bit jealous. E is a seventy year old with perfect, beautiful breasts. I don't have perfect, beautiful breasts after five decades on the planet and four breastfed babies. The least they could have done was to give E an age appropriate droop and sag.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Cheese with my Whine

As a small business person, I AM REALLY READY for the recession to end. I am sure I am not alone . . . .